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Screens, booze, weed, video games, gambling, members of the opposite sex: all are temptations that can be dealt with through strategies that make it easier to control ourselves and avoid risk.

Screen-based addictions

Control your phone

Read Digital Minimalism for motivation and how to think clearly about the pros and cons of our smartphone-based digital age. Jean M. Twenge is also a thoughtful critic.

Install Minimalist Phone first (Android and iOS), setting your machine to greyscale to make it more boring, and to a text-based list of apps. Only include apps in your ‘favorites’ list that are useful and necessary. Hide the distracting ones elsewhere.

Next, install Freedom.to. This one is really a game-changer because you can set time-based sessions to block lists of apps and websites when you don’t want to use them. I do this at bedtime so I don’t stay up late wasting time on Youtube, etc. Set up lists and blocking sessions for any time of day so that you can focus on what you really want to do with your time.

I purchased the lifetime subscription option for both apps. It’s the best money I’ve ever spent on digital goods.

Remove nonessential notifications, pop-ups,

Use Minimalist phone to hide/block notifications for various services. I do this for text messages, social media, Amazon, and anything else where real-time notifications are completely unnecessary and an invitation to waste time.

I also use messages.google.com on my laptop to receive SMS messages on my laptop. You can do the same thing for WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, Google Chat, etc. I like bucketing the hours I check nonessential texts to my work day hours on the laptop, unless I intentionally check them on my phone by opening the Messages app.

I have a separate app I use with people I message frequently and see in the physical world like family, neighbors, and close friends for ‘essential’ messages, and I keep notifications on for this app.

Tell people to call you if they need a response ASAP to make up for the fact that you won’t be constantly keeping up with text threads throughout the day. Speaking to someone is a much more fulfilling method of conversation anyway!

Control your laptop/ipad

Use Freedom.to on your laptop as well, including your work one. Set a specific list of filters for work day sessions.

Control your smart TV

Uninstall apps on your smart TV/Amazon Firestick and set up PINs/parental controls. Or, dump your remote control(s) or Firestick into a timed lock box that only unlocks on, say, weekends or whenever you allow yourself to use them.

Here’s some strategies (from AI) for removing Youtube– as an example– from your smart TV:

Non-screen vices

Strategies for moderation

Invest in timed lock boxes like those by Ksafe (I recommend a clear, large one to fit the most stuff), or this small one for phones/small things, that you can dump phones, video game controllers, drugs, alcohol, credit cards, snacks, or keys that go to locks– like if you wanted to lock your refrigerator, or a cabinet full of snacks, to avoid eating close to bedtime.

You set the timer and lock your stuff inside. Now you are forced to go without those things until the time is up and it unlocks. It’s a great way to space out your vices and only have them on weekends, say, or whenever works best for you.

Strategies for abstention

If you don’t ever want to do certain things, don’t let them inside your house or go near the places where you can do them! I have zero willpower if unhealthy food is around me, so I need to keep it out of my house in the first place: don’t go down the grocery store aisle where it lives, don’t put it in your shopping cart, and don’t bring it into your home. If it’s in your home, hide it somewhere hard to get at, or ask your spouse or roommates to lock it up where only they have they key.

Encourage guests or family members not to bring, say, desserts into your home without promising to take them away with them when they leave. Don’t go to the weed store or buy booze if you don’t want to use it/drink it. Stay away from bars or other places where you can buy booze if you don’t want to drink at all.

If you gamble, many casinos let you ‘self-ban’. Or, you can at least limit your habit by asking a casino not to let you cash checks, or leaving credit cards at home and only bringing the amount of cash you wish to lose with you.

Substitution of better alternatives

Substitute the things you don’t want for things that still scratch the itch. I don’t drink alcohol very much these days, but I’ve found non-alcoholic beer gives me a lot of what I love about beer: it’s cold, carbonated, tastes (mostly) like ‘real’ beer, and doesn’t give me a hangover or make me feel drowsy after having one. Plus, you can drink one in the car! Maybe a weekly poker game with your buddies would let you gamble at low cost without the casino’s cash-crushing rake.

If you’re trying to cut down on caffeine, whole bean decaf coffee is close to the real thing. If you’re missing the dopamine hit of entertaining screen time, try podcasts, radio plays, the radio, or reading a book/Kindle (get thee to a library!)

I love movies, but still find myself struggling at night after a long day of work & kids to have the attention span to watch one vs short-form garbage youtube content, so blocking youtube helps me have more ‘quality’ screen time. Better entertainment time is a win for me.

Avoid temptation and reduce risk with good habits

For risks that aren’t rooted in physical items or substances, avoid being in a risky situations. For couples, follow the Mike Pence/Billy Graham rule: don’t consume alcohol in a co-ed group– and certainly 1:1– without your spouse. Avoid 1:1 social meetings with members of the opposite sex– or at least, not in private. Pence’s rule was to avoid 1:1 meals with a woman, specifically, in addition to avoiding alcohol without his wife around.

Rules like these are the classic technique of working backwards: start from where you do not want to end up, think about how people commonly get there, and then avoid the behaviors that lead to it.

How do workplace extramarital affairs start? With private, 1:1 meetings, often with alcohol, and spending a lot of time with a member of the opposite sex that you’re attracted to. Avoid those meetings from the outset!

How many stories have we heard about men and women cheating on their spouses with close associates like campaign managers, personal assistants, or other confidants, or after a boozy outing with the ‘boys’ or ‘girls’ chatting up a member of the opposite sex in relative privacy?

How do people get DUIs? They drink too much and have access to their cars. A friend of mine who tends to over-drink when he goes out always makes sure to Uber to the bar. Because of this, he has no possible way to make his night worse by driving drunk, and simply Ubers back at the end of the night.

How do most people get hurt in motor vehicle accidents? By not wearing seatbelts, driving drunk (or getting hit by a drunk driver), speeding, or riding motor cycles (or at least, without proper safety gear and precautions like a helmet and tough clothes.)

How do people drown? By not wearing life jackets at all times (85-87% of people who drown were not wearing life jackets.) How do people get lost in the woods and die of exposure? By wandering off trails and failing to have the 10 essentials on them for every hike or backpacking trip.

How do people get hurt by violence? By being around violent actors: a domestic partner who has hit you or your child before, or threatened you with violence. Getting drunk around men (it’s usually men!) you can’t trust completely. Or by being in the middle of people who will behave irrationally: bars at closing time, street ‘takeovers’, while committing crimes or in a high-crime area (ex: inner city gas station) at a high-crime time (ex: late at night.)

Avoiding temptation and risk is much easier than resisting it right in front of you.

Investment accounts allow you to borrow ‘on margin’ at rates above the Federal funds rate. I’ll discuss how margin loans work at Altruist.com, the investment platform where I manage my clients’ & my family’s assets.

Margin borrowing

You can borrow against the value of your securities at these rates. Altruist currently charges +2.5% above the Federal Funds rate (~3.75% as of August 2026, so 6.25 % interest total) for loans up to $50,000, +2.25% for loans $50 K – $100 K, and +2% for loans between $100 K – $1 million. So far as I can tell, Altruist doesn’t charge any origination or other fees to use margin. (They charge $25 if they have to sell securities due to a margin call.)

Potential benefits of margin borrowing

If you are strapped for cash but don’t want to sell securities– perhaps to avoid taxes– and other financing alternatives are unavailable or too expensive for you (e.g.: HELOCs, personal loans, mortgage equity loans), then margin borrowing might provide a more cost-effective alternative.

Risks of margin borrowing

Margin calls if the market declines

If the market declines, you will get a ‘margin call’ where you must invest extra cash to avoid having your securities sold (presumably at a loss relative to when you started borrowing.) This can have a catastrophic cascading effect where you have to sell securities at a loss to bring cash, but you don’t HAVE cash because that’s why you were borrowing in the first place!

To avoid this, keep the percentage that you’re borrowing to at least half of the maximums allowed so that you can weather a 50% decline in stock market prices before being required to put up more cash.

Interest rate fluctuations

Because the rates charged are based the Federal funds rate, increases in that rate will increase your borrowing costs.

Disclaimer: I’m not an attorney or accountant/CPA, and this is not legal or tax advice. Check anything I say here with your own attorney or tax advisor.

There are currently nine community property states, and a few others*** that allow the creation of community property. In Washington state, where I live, married couples’ property earned during their marriage is generally considered community property, such as income, property purchased, etc. Any property earned PRIOR to the marriage is considered separate property, unless the couple intentionally commingles it. Any gifts or inheritances received by one spouse during the marriage are also considered separate property.

IRS’s step-up basis rule defaults for differently-titled accounts in community property states

Individual accounts

When one spouse dies, any taxable assets held in that spouse’s individual taxable account should receive full step basis at death, meaning the surviving spouse can sell or gift those assets tax-free at the time of the deceased spouse’s death.

JTWROS

Any assets held in a Joint Tenants With Right of Survivorship (JTWROS) account could potentially only receive step-up basis on HALF the account’s value per default IRS treatment, but that half will transfer immediately to the other spouse without going through probate. JTWROS is usually the ‘default’ joint brokerage type at major brokerages. (For homes purchased while married, community property is the assumed ownership type for real estate in Washington state.)

I believe you can make the case to the IRS that the entire balance should be treated as community property, but that this might not work out and would be a hassle vs using a JCP. California may NOT respect this treatment at all with JTWROS, so either way, a JCP seems ‘safer’.

Joint Community Property (JCP) and CPWROS

If instead a couple chooses to move their assets into a joint community property account, the account MUST go through probate (no beneficiaries are allowed to be assigned), BUT it will receive double-step up basis at death, meaning the entire account balance will be stepped up when only one spouse passes away. Even better is a Community Property With Right of Survivorship (CPWROS) account, which allows double-step up basis AND avoid probate for the surviving spouse. This can be a huge tax advantage to the surviving spouse if there are highly-appreciated securities in that account. The con side is that the account must go through probate, but in Washington state, that is usually not a big deal, assuming that both spouses have their wills up to date. (Californians should do their own homework on the value of avoiding probate, as I understand it is much more onerous.)

Should married couples move their taxable assets into community property accounts?

The tradeoff is (1) potential tax-savings for the surviving spouse or other heirs that the surviving spouse might want to gift to vs (2) probate and (3) the loss of separate property treatment in the event of a divorce.

If one spouse had a significant inheritance from their parents that they’ve kept separately in their own individual account, a judge would likely award all of that to them in the event of a divorce, since it would be clearly their own separate property. If that spouse chooses to transfer any of that inheritance to a community property account, it is now owned 50-50 by both parties, and loses it’s separateness.

So, if you are not worried about divorce, you ARE worried about avoiding capital gains taxes, and you’re ok with the assets going through probate, moving money to a joint community property brokerage can be a wise move.

Recommendation

For older couples in solid relationships who are unlikely to ever divorce and who are comfortable navigating probate in their state (ex: Washingtonians), I would recommend they move their individual or JTWROS equity assets to a joint community property account to prepare for one of them passing away to avoid future capital gains taxes.

For younger couples in good health or with low capital gains with unequal amounts of separate property, it might be a good idea to wait on commingling everything into a community property brokerage in case they ever decide to separate, as roughly 50% of all marriages do.

Point of clarification

Retirement accounts like 401ks, IRAs, or other individual-only accounts like HSAs, are NOT eligible to be community property. Generally, taxable brokerage accounts, bank accounts, and real estate are things to consider making community property.]

Appendix

*** Wikipedia as of 2026-08-04: “Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Washington, and Wisconsin [are community property states.]

Four other states have adopted optional community property systems. Alaska allows spouses to create community property by entering into a community property agreement or by creating a community property trust.[2] In 2010, Tennessee adopted a law similar to Alaska’s and allows residents and non-residents to opt into community property through a community property trust.[3] More recently, Kentucky adopted an optional community property system in 2020, allowing residents and non-residents to establish community property trusts.[4] Finally, Florida adopted a similar law in 2021, allowing citizens and noncitizens to establish community property trusts.”